First of all, I want to apologize for abandoning the blog. For those of you who don’t know, the kids and I moved from Korea …..without my husband. Unpacking with two little ones at my feet has been exhausting and there doesn’t seem to be enough hours in the day to get everything done. I usually go to bed right after the kids. Exciting stuff. Thankfully life without my husband is coming to an end. We are all ready to see P in person.
Back to the point of this post. My 2014 word of the year was “simplify”. A big part of that goal was to remove the clutter so I could focus on my family. I’ve been failing. Big time.
A large part of it had to do with how much time I spent working. I tried cutting it down to just four portrait sessions a week, then two, then finally one per week. I was still feeling burnt out. I wasn’t picking up my camera unless it was for work.
Sitting behind a computer 40 hours a week while I begged my family to let me work in peace was not how I envisioned balancing working from home and motherhood. It wasn’t working, no matter how much I tried. I wasn’t the kind of mother I wanted to be or the kind that my children needed.
I was forced to take a break from the business with this move and I thought the break would give me the reset I needed before taking portraits again. Well, this little break did something else. It made me realize that I’ve been putting so much energy into my business and I didn’t have enough to give to the people I love most. I have more patience, the house is cleaner, laundry gets done and I’ve cooked more in the last two months than I have the entire first half of the year. The most important thing is that my children are happier.
I still love photography (A LOT) and still plan on working, but I’ve shifted focus on a different type of photography. P’s job requires frequent moves, crazy hours and deployments. I knew I had to make a very drastic change. My husband has been a huge part of the behind the scenes aspect of the business, but I can’t depend on him to cook dinner, bathe kids and to pick up the housework slack while he’s halfway across the world.
My new schedule is flexible and I can take pictures while my kids are playing five feet away. No more late night editing. No more hiding behind my computer while my family needs me. No more worrying about child care or traffic. More family, more love and more time for all the other things that I enjoy doing (like blogging).
I’m not abandoning portrait photography forever. I’ll probably do sessions for fun and friends can pay me with Thai food. I may start taking clients full time again when the kids are both in elementary school. V just turned four and E is still only a year old. I want to focus on being present with them while they’re still so very little.
The August Joy Photography Workflow sets will still be released later this Fall along with the big release of what I’m working on now. I hate to be so vague, but it’s hard to spill the beans without having my main computer and editing software here. Soon!
**Images by Zayda Barros Photography (Now in Naples, ITALY!)**